Controlled crying good for babies?
Is controlled crying bad for your baby?
Is controlled crying bad for you?
According to The Murdoch Children’s Research Institute at the Royal Children’s Hospital in Melbourne controlled crying can be very beneficial for tired and depressed mothers without harming the baby.
Susie O’Brien from the Herald Sun blogged about it and also reported on this study.
And of course, when it comes to baby’s sleep - a very contentious are - not everyone agrees with the research.
But I think it’s important to recognise that the aim of this study was to find out whether helping babies sleep better, by using controlled crying, reduced depression amongst mothers without adversely affecting the babies.
And they found that it did reduce depression amongst mothers and it wasn’t harmful to the baby up to 2 years later.
What this research highlights is the importance of parent wellbeing for baby’s wellbeing.
Depressed mums are not good for kids.
We need to get beyond the ‘best for baby’ argument and look at the ‘best for baby and best for parents’ argument.
Parenting is an amazing, dynamic, and intimate relationship. It isn’t all about the baby nor all about the parents.
It’s about both. Their interaction, interrelationship and interdependence.
What this means is - if you don’t have a problem with your baby’s waking through the night, then there is no problem.
But if you do, controlled crying once your baby is older than 6 months, might be worth trying.
By Jodie Benveniste, Director of Parent Wellbeing.
April 16th, 2009 at 10:53 am
I am pleased to hear of these results after spending 3 painful, heartwrenching nights control crying our 7 month old daughter. After weeks of sleep deprivation I didn’t even realise that I was going in to her at the slightest noise and probably waking her even more then if I had waited 1-2 minutes to see if she would put herself back to sleep. It was my husband that put a stop to it and was tough with me and said no, you can’t go in and feed her. We still went in ever 10 minutes (for the times she was crying). The first night she cried for about 2 hours before falling back to sleep, the 2nd night for an hour and a half and the third night for half an hour. Now we may hear a murmur but I don’t even think about getting up, now that I am rested and can make a rational decision.
bring on controlled crying - but you need supportive people (namely partners) around you to do it. I believe in nature and we were given a mum and a dad because both are good at different things - Mums aren’t good at letting their babies cry - to their own detriment.
April 16th, 2009 at 11:54 am
Carolyn - In my family, it’s the opposite. I was much better at letting my babies cry (a little) when I knew they didn’t need food, burping, cuddling - and that instead they needed to learn how to self-soothe. My husband found it much more difficult then me. It is a very touchy subject for many parents and people have different thresholds for this stuff. Glad it worked out for you and your family! Cheers, Jodie.
May 18th, 2010 at 9:21 pm
We are up to day 8 of controlled crying, and my daughter had slowly gotten a lot better. We did do it first when she was 6 months which was fine, and then we wet camping at about 8 months, which through her routine out. So after 8 weeks of breastfeeding her to sleep and trying to put her in the cot without waking up I decided it had taken it’s toll and we needed to do it again. She is doing very well, except I now understand the need to do it during the day time as well. It is 7.30 am, and she has been awake since 5.30, I put her in her cot this morning, she had a little cry as a walked out fo the room, lasted about 3 mins, and now hasnt made a peep… I’m just waiting a little bit before i go in there to make sure she is asleep as i dont want to disrupt her.
But yes I am very pleased to find this article as I have stumbled accross a lot of thigns that are agaisnt controlled crying.